It is I, John Munch

Not that it's any of you people's business, but it was a callus. Don't ask. I have a skin allergy to water, thanks to all the "extras" put in there - and the people who sell the filters are all part of the scam, and I need a new brand of bottled water, I suppose, not that I LIKE buying into their scam...but I digress....
The big lug has pnuemonia.
No, I'm not kidding you, pnuemonia. He went home, didn't call anyone for two weeks and then the lab tech he's been seeing found him on the floor. Relax. He was sleeping there on purpose.
He'd made some kind of pillow pyramid, because when he laid down, he couldn't breathe - did I mention he likes to call other people weird while being completely insane himself?
Anyhow, she screamed bloody murder, got him to the doctor, he's on antibiotics, and still can't sit up for any amount of time.
He told me to tell you that The Devil's Candy is a really good book, and that the ten hardest english words to translate are:
1. Plenipotentiary
2. Gobbledygook
3. Serendipity
4. Poppycock
5. Googly
6. Spam
7. Whimsy
8. Bumf
9. Chuffed
10. Kitsch
I told him nobody would care, and he told me to shove it. I think he's feeling better.
JM, up and out.