Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Change is Good For the Soul

Ah, I don't mean that. Normally, I like being in a rut. But things are unsettled. That is not good. Therefore, I will make a modest proposal.
So, for this moment, here is serious and introspective Mike. You may not like me this way, but it's only one post. What's fun about that? Well, if I'm being moody and thoughtful, then someone else has to be goofy - just for the once. They can trade off. You other three, snarky, dark & moody, hopeless romantic - you take one post off, too and be someone else's version of you. The intellectual, the paranoid, the driven woman, the renagade artiste, anyone I've forgotten - you can play, too, but only if you want.
So, here goes.

I was thinking of two very different women tonight, two women that people have reminded me of recently.

The ex: It's all fun at KD's expense here, but remember, there's two sides to every story. The film (and book) High Fidelity cut really close to me for two reasons:
First, there was the quote from the main character: "I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments."
Secondly, there was a bit where he said something to the effect of this: Take the five worst things you've ever done and write them down. No explanations, no justifications. Now who's the asshole?
But the rest of that sad, sordid tale will have to wait.

Now, here's a little holiday story, courtesy of my Mom. Right about now, two weeks or so before Christmas, in my sophmore year of high school, I get home from school. Right away, I know there's trouble coming. She's in that mood. I don't even need to see the bottles. I'm late, so she has her excuse. She starts with the yelling, getting too close, with the fumes rolling off her, her breath so thick with it, it stings. She's backing me into the corner, like always. And I snap. I lean forward, and shout so loud she winces, "F**k you! Why do you do this, you crazy bitch?"
Now remember, nice Irish Catholic boys don't drop the f-bomb on their mothers. She looks like I've slapped her, and she raises her hand to me. Again. To her, this is just a minor setback. But this is different, because this time I'm not taking it. I swing at her - right past her, and put a nice dent in the wall right next to her head.
She narrows her eyes, and I swear she lets out a little growl. But for all that, she's not sure what to do. Dad's not home to defend her. I'm bigger than her, and for the first time, she really sees that. Finally she hisses, "Get out."
She doesn't need to say it twice. I fly out the door and hitch to Jersey, where I stay with my aunt and uncle for a few weeks. After Christmas, we pretend nothing happened, like we always do, and I go back home again. Joyeux frickin' noel.
There is a bright side. I didn't do my homework well into February. The teachers'd ask, and I'd say, "My Ma threw me out, and my books are in the house." She had, after all, thrown me out, and the books were in the house. The two were true, they just weren't actually simultaneous. However, I didn't feel the need to correct the assumptions that people made when they heard 'em together.


And done. Back to funny. It's nice and safe, thanks very much.

18 Comments:

At 6:54 AM, Blogger Axe said...

You beat me to it. I was also going to share a holiday story courtesy of both my parents, to explain why I hate Christmas, but...

I see you know rage too. It ripens you, doesn't it?

 
At 7:17 AM, Blogger Mike said...

Like a moldy cheese? Nah.

 
At 7:44 AM, Blogger Criminal Minds Fan said...

Having good parents is great and having bad parents seems to be the norm around here. Being in the same room with my parents still makes my blood pressure rise. Hard to believe that given the way our parents are that we turned out to the be the well grounded, normal people we are! :)

 
At 8:22 AM, Blogger Axe said...

Ha!! Good one, DP!!

 
At 8:34 AM, Blogger Shadow of a Joke said...

Good stories, very deep and pointed. Love your work Mike.

 
At 10:17 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

Thanks for sharing Mikey.

 
At 1:00 PM, Blogger Mike said...

I won't make fun, but I'm not keen on Jewel, except for her cover of "Across the Universe" That, I liked.

Can we compromise on Suzanne Vega? Maybe her early stuff, at least?

Oh, well. No matter what, we'll always have "Lovecats."

 
At 1:16 PM, Blogger bogusboobs said...

Agatha Christie once said: "One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is to have a happy chilhood." I got lucky. We didn't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out, but my parents were too young and too in love to care. They saw three girls through near-fatal illness, and made sure we were warm and loved and way, way over-educated.

Guess what, though? I'm as screwed up as any of you ... I just get to call home and commiserate with ma about it.

Love & kisses, "BB."

 
At 2:14 PM, Blogger ann said...

Mike, your words really move me and thanks for sharing this with us.

The events of my childhood informed how it would be for my children; I made sure they can look back to their childhood with happy memories and not carry with them the baggage that I carry.

BTW; High Fidelity by Nick Hornby is a brilliant book; the film was good, the book was better, and I recommend it.

And Mike, you're sooooo right; there's safety in humour. Even if I don't succeed, I do try to be funny!!!!

lotsa luv ann xxxxxx

 
At 4:09 PM, Blogger Faye_Hart said...

I count my self lucky to be blessed with great parents, even if Mom is getting a bit out there lately. :)

I feel for you though. And the young boy you were. And I find you guys to be wonderful.

 
At 4:13 PM, Blogger Nomi said...

For what's supposed to be the most joyous season of the year, there doesn't seem to be much joy around, does there?
I sympathise with you, Mike. I'm fortunate not to have deadbeat parents, but things are pretty much shit anyway.
Don't feel obliged to be 'funny' all the time, if you don't want to. Sometimes it helps to get stuff like that out in the open.

And on that thought, I'm off to my own blog for similar venting.

 
At 5:26 PM, Blogger Chloe' Gardner said...

This is totally off subject, but I'm laughing my ass off of your links- I love that I'm Yowza- and Subway Chick's- that's priceless *LMAO* If that doesn't put me in a good mood, nothing will *LOL*

 
At 6:14 PM, Blogger Deb Walsh said...

Hey Mikey you asked me on my blog what book would it be. I read everything. But have you read The original Lady Chaterley's Lover.
Or the story of Lady Godiva. Then there are the many many Bodice rippers I have read over the years. Right now I am reading a lot of James Patterson.

Tell me what kind of book you would like to catch me reading.
:)

 
At 9:09 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

You do realize what Elliot's going to do to you for refering to me as that "SVU Chick"?

 
At 9:23 PM, Blogger Mike said...

It's "SVU Babe" - and if he's able to tear his eyes off you in that dress, he's going to see a whole line of guys to whomp on for drooling over you.

 
At 12:10 AM, Blogger Chloe' Gardner said...

Mike, be nice to Olivia- remember, if you're not Elliot will come after you *L*

 
At 12:59 AM, Blogger Mike said...

If Benson wants me to change the tags because it irks her, I'll do it.

Ah, scratch that. It's mean to do that to her and not to Alex and Carolyn...so I'll go change theirs...Kidding!

 
At 1:06 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

Mike, you oughta know by now I can hold my own. I work in the "boys club" too- don't change a thing. ;)

 

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